


Ron Meets Tammy (II)

by l1ls3b



Category: Parks and Recreation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 22:14:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5472512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/l1ls3b/pseuds/l1ls3b





	Ron Meets Tammy (II)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [suitablyskippy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/suitablyskippy/gifts).



Though it was against his father’s wishes, college was of great importance to Ron Swanson. He enjoyed his rugged upbringing and did not think lowly of the steel mill, but something in him needed to see what else was out there. 

Tammy 1 had also approved of him getting a college education. Despite her being a malingering she-devil, she had been in charge of his education most of his life and seemed to know what she was talking about. 

Ron took many different classes in college, but one of his favorite classes was “The History of Woodworking”. For his final paper in the class he decided to write about the increased use of composite wood products after increasing deforestation made natural wood more scarce. This paper required a lot of outside research, so Ron needed to go to his favorite place: the library. 

Ron did not have many books around growing up, and relied in his younger years on the library and eventually the collection of Tammy 1. One of his favorite books was _Basic Economics: A Common Sense Guide to the Economy_ by Thomas Sowell. It was through his own exploratory reading as a teenager that Ron solidified his views on the government and society in general. Through books he was able to enter into theoretical conversations that he could not have with his peers as a teenager, and took much solace in retreating to a good historical non-fiction read. This is to say that this woodworking paper was right up his alley. 

So, on this day, Ron walked out to the library at the campus of University of Southern Indiana to check out a few books exciting titles such as _Woodworking in the Middle Ages_ and _Composite Wood and the Future of Woodworking_ , suggested to him by his professor, Mr. Blawks.

He walked into David L. Rice Library, going straight to the historical non-fiction section with an admirable sense of purpose and haste. This did not go unnoticed by one Tamara Krueger, leading library intern. As soon as Ron had walked his lean, outdoorsy butt inside, she had zoned in on him like an angry, manipulative bull to a red target. She now got up quietly from her desk, stealthily following him deep into non-fiction MH 999.1- 800.1. 

“Can I help you with anything?” Tammy breathily whispered to Ron. 

“No,” said Ron, not looking up from the books he was flipping through intensely. 

“Are you sure??” asked Tammy, just as breathily, but perhaps not quite as quietly. 

Ron, initially annoyed by the disruption of his reading activity, looked up to see Tammy with one leg perched ever so scandalously on one of the shelves, putting him about eye-level with her lady business. He stook up and took in the bespectacled beauty in full, admiring her low-cut dress and increasingly drawn into her beady and hypnotizing eyes. Tammy immediately notices her effect on him.

“Well?” she said, recovering her whisper. 

“I’m afraid not, Miss. Nothing I’d like your help with would be appropriate for the library.”

“I guess I will just have to meet you outside of the library then,” she said, coyly. 

“I’ll meet you at the rose garden in 10 minutes,” said Ron.

“Okay, whatever,” said Tammy, almost dismissing him. 

Ron checked out his books, and for the first time in his life, did not plan on reading them voraciously afterwards. Instead, he practically ran from the library to the rose garden. 

He sat and waited patiently, his only motivation being that he could maybe see that dark leather haired vixen he has just encountered. 

He waited and waited. Almost 40 minutes passed and he began to think about giving up, starting to believe that he must have been imagining things inside the library.

Yet finally Tammy sauntered over to him, acting as if nothing had happened. 

“So here’s how this is going to work. You’re going to come over to my apartment tonight and you’re going to ravage me like the sex demon that you are. You’re going to bang me into the next solar system. Here is my address,” she said, handing him a small slip of paper that smelled like it had been kept in someone’s boob sweat. Which was fairly to be expected, since Tammy had pulled it out right from into between her own boobs. 

A giddy smile crept over Ron’s face. 

“Yes, yes I will,” he giggled. 

Ron tried to lean in for a kiss, and Tammy waggled her finger at him.

“Uh, uh, uh, save it for later, tiger,” she said, turning around abruptly and sashaying away. He could hardly wait, but he had no idea what was in store. 

 

*

 

That night Ron could hardly wait to head over to Tammy’s. He got there an hour early and waited in the parking lot next door, pacing, anxiously trying to figure out when it might be acceptable for him to head up. He wasn’t the kind who would arrive this early, but he felt like his brain had gone to mush since he met this woman. He felt like he had to be there, but he also felt like he had to wait.

Two minutes before, he caved and could not wait any longer. He knocked. Tammy answered the door wearing a tiger-print robe tied very loosely, which contrasted significantly with Ron’s jeans and crisp red polo shirt. 

“I love that outfit,” she said to him. 

All he could do was laugh like a small child. She pulled him into her apartment by the belt buckle and slammed the door behind her. 

 

*

 

Ron woke up the next morning wearing presumably-Tammy’s leopard-print robe. She lay in bed next to him, smoking a cigarette. 

“What a night, huh?” she said, “I didn’t think you would make it after that second bump of cocaine but you’re awake. You must be so strong.” She played with his chest hair, which was now shaped like a heart. It matched his new ear piercing quite well. 

Ron had interesting nights in the past. His family’s moonshine was responsible for many abstract looking chairs he owned. 

“But you need to leave now. Come back the same time tomorrow.” 

Ron stumbled away, feeling dazed. He realized as he walked out the door that he was no longer at Tammy’s apartment, but at The Bluebell Motel. 

He began the slow walk back to his place in puffy pink slippers. All he could think about was the next day, and how he was going to get this beautiful, uncontrollable woman out of his head. 

And so began Ron’s relationship with Tammy II.


End file.
